My daughter and I have a random
running musical in our lives that involves the term life goals. For example, "Making spaghetti. Life Goals!" Also, "Remembering to
set the alarm to get up early. Life
Goals!" Someday, we may organize
this enough to actually get an entire musical in order (don't hold your breath
- it hasn't made our life goals list yet).
Over the past few weeks, I
have noticed that I have come to an age of maturity that involves not caring so
much about what other people think about me and advocating more for
myself. This is actually a life goal
that I didn't realize I had but boy did I need it. This has been developing over my entire life
with events taking place here and there that forced me out of my comfort zone
only for me to retreat back to it once I had done what needed to be done. I'm not sure why these events have made me
open my eyes up to this feeling as I am sure it has been this way longer than
the past month but it leaves me feeling a little lighter in my step.
At the end of May, we
spent the weekend camping. Actually on
my menu was lunch at a local restaurant.
That's right - driving out of the campground, not cooking our own meal
over a fire and eating in an air-conditioned restaurant with food that I enjoy
but don't get often because the restaurant is not in our town. I didn't think anything of this until, when
we were walking back to our campsite, one of the other guests made it a point
to walk up to us and asked something like, "Is that actually a pizza box?"
"Yes," we replied. "Where
did you get that?" "There's a
restaurant about 15 minutes away," Ben said. "Oh," said the man and walked
away. Personally, I think he just wanted
pizza and thought he might find it on-site.
Nope. Only after that brief exchange
of words did I realize that ten or so years ago, I wouldn't have even
considered leaving the campground to get food for fear of what people would
think. The lesson here is if you want
something, don't let the concern of what others will think make up your mind
for you.
This past weekend, we went
to Washington, D.C. to meet up with some friends and spend a beautiful day at
the Library of Congress, the Smithsonian Castle and the Freer Gallery of
Art. Ever the planner, I enjoy looking
at what to get into while we are there (hence, these places noted above with
the exception of the Freer Gallery, that was a walk-on bonus). My main goal at the Library of Congress was
to get a Reader Card for a few reasons: the awesome factor of having a card
from the largest library in the world that gives me the privilege of reading
whatever I like there and being able to physically walk into the most beautiful
room I've ever seen.
Our first stop was the
information desk to get directions on where to get this precious card. "Oh, are you doing research?" the
information desk lady asks excitedly.
"No, I really just want a card." "Oh, well, we really frown upon getting
the card if it is not for research purposes.
The Reader Card is really for people to do research. We have a nice gift shop where you can
purchase a souvenir." I blank stare
at her and she continues after the uncomfortable silence, "But if you
insist on getting one, you go down the stairs, then down a yellow hallway then
up an elevator then down another hall . . ." and she says something about
the cloak room. "Thanks," I
say and walk away. I go over to my crew
and they ask what she said. I tell them
and Jason asks what I'm going to do.
"I'm getting a card, that's what," or something to that
effect. It probably took us more than 20
minutes to find the place, after asking multiple people, but we made it.
After sleeping on what happened at the information desk, I'm
still agitated that she even felt like she had a right to dictate to me, or
anyone else (because I am undoubtedly certain I am not the first person she has
given this speech to), what I should and should not do. This wasn't me back then. Back then, I would have metaphorically tucked
my tail between my legs and maybe even peed myself a little bit for even
thinking that I should ask for a Reader Card.
How dare I want such a frivolous card for my own petty desires. It should be good enough that I can look at
the room from behind a glass wall three or four stories up. The lesson here, if you care to have one, is if
you want it, get it. Don't let what
someone else tells you make you stray from your own path of happiness to make him
or her happy. Make yourself happy.
I, for one, spend a lot of
time and effort trying to help other people be happy, and I love giving of
myself for this purpose but I also used to think that it wasn't appropriate for
me to concern myself with my own happiness.
It was for the people around me to make that happen. Something switched on in my brain and now
I know, it's okay for me to do things
that make me happy. And you want to hear
the most crazy part? It's okay for you
to do things that make you happy, too! Life
goals!
